The Sun Had Its Own Will | Painting of inner power

The Sun Had Its Own Will is like life. You have plans, but then the Universe says, I have bigger plans for you, and slaps you in the face. But you don’t know about that plan until you overcome the thing that you thought would be on your agenda to achieve. 

This painting is about inner power. 

I had been on this journey of self-discovery since I left my home country, if not even before. I was on this new journey, living around the world alone with my husband. I often found myself exploring my thoughts by visiting my inner self. I would sit silently somewhere in this beautiful world (Chile, Peru, Argentina, France, India, Croatia, etc.) with her (me) to find answers. I had questions but did not know how to form and vocalize them. No, I did not do that on purpose. It happens to happen like this. Life suddenly changed so much for me and brought me to a new level where I was all confused. As I searched for those answers, I would start feeling as if I found myself until our next move. And then, the new slap would come from the Universe, and I would have to revisit my inner self to search for the power I have within myself to carry on.

This painting had been my escape to explore the questions of how I can find this higher self within myself Vol. 2 or 2000 😊. No, I am not joking. Every time I moved to the country, I had to rediscover myself. This self-discovery purely happened by being in solitude with myself and establishing repetitive returns to it. I know that being alone with yourself can be such a dam enemy. The self-talk can be so annoying but yet super encouraging.

Here is the thing. There are two Ana’s that live inside of me. “Calm and collected Ana” and “Sceptical, Ana.” I am talking about my true self vs. my ego. It’s a skill to know how to play with both. The most complex game is to tame the ego. The ego is the one that usually projects these silly, skeptical thoughts of not being enough and trying to side-track you from the path you want to follow because it’s afraid to get out of its comfort zone. And then you stay in that negative mindset because you become afraid of moving forward or escalating. It honestly feels like drowning.

When I started my creative path, that’s when I began to work in collaboration with myself and my ego. And it is the best thing I can tell you. Being creative in any sense is such a healing.

The Sun Had Its Own Will had been such a lovely journey to explore myself through it for another time. Painting for me is the true power that I find within myself. It shapes me into the woman I want to be. It shapes me into a woman who encourages other women to be themselves. My encouragement comes in these bold figures and bold, saturated colors to remind you never to stop searching for your better self, no matter how lost you are. And don’t forget - you might get valuable advice from people, but the answers are within yourself - just listen very carefully.

And to touch on these plans, the Universe has it for you - they always end up being way better than You planned for when you collaborate together.

Ciao, Ana